My strict boudoir photography image usage rules: Do whatever the hell you want

I often see posts and images going around that photographers post complaining about how their clients use their images.  I want to make my usage guidelines clear, so that I never have to do a post complaining about it.

Do whatever the hell you want with your images. 

Seriously. 

Want to post them on Instagram and stick a filter on them?  Cool.  Want to print them out and paint on them or draw on them and create your own art?  I would love to see that!  Want to practice your photoshop skills on them?  No problem.  Want to edit them to make them Facebook postable?  Please do!  There's an iphone app that lets you stick kittens on your photos.  Facebook hates nipples but loves kittens, so by all means cover your nipples with kittens! I don't watermark anything because I don't want to, so you don't have to worry about cropping out any watermarks.  Print them wherever you want.  Print them on regular printer paper or at the highest end lab, either is fine.  

I am so honored that you chose me as your photographer, to truly bare your soul, and your body, to me.  A photo session with me is a collaboration between the two of us in every way.  Yes, I spend a lot of time getting your images to where they make me happy, and I deliver a finished product to you.  And I want them to make you as happy as they possibly can, so if you would like to continue the collaboration and play with the photos, I love that.  I don't want the photos I took of you only on a pedestal, printed only at the finest labs, at a revered place on your wall. I want you to be able to live with your images, and do with them as you please, just as you live with the photos you take.  It's cool when you send me photos of your images on your wall.  But it's also just as cool if your photos just live as digitals on your phone, where you can have them close by all the time.  

If you post them on social media and you want to credit me and my business page, I love to see that.  But I will never make that a requirement.  You paid me to take images for you, you didn't pay me so that you can advertise for me. That's not your job.  I'm sure if you forget to credit me, or just don't want to, if someone wants to know who took the photo they'll ask you. I'd rather you credit me because you are so thrilled with your experience you want to shout it from the rooftops, than because I told you that you have to credit me.  

I know this is completely opposite from how, well, every other photographer I know feels, and I'm ok with being weird.  I would never disparage them for retaining these rights or asking for credit, I applaud them for doing what is best for their business and heart, and I understand their reasoning.  My heart loves watching my photos take on a life of their own after they leave my hands, and my business follows my heart.